Love???

It's a great day to blog.
I know it's been a while, but since school has officially started I have had to start a new routine 😄, finally think I have it down.
This blog is about complicated love, a love that has so many twists and turns it would make a roller coaster jealous.
Can you be with a person who pushes you away and then reels you back in? Yes no relationship is perfect and they all have ups and downs, but can we really live with not just the ups and downs but twists and turns? I guess some of us have more guts than others... but what do you do when there isn't an easy way out? You are completely in love with this person and can never see yourself not having them on your life. 
Being called names is not fun, feeling like your opinion doesn't matter is the worse, how do you change for the better when your other half is just looking out for him or herself? 
No Angels here ... it takes two, as they say. Respect is key, when one loses that, the other partner is left to feel so so alone.
I guess living life the way you can is the key, happiness and true love is in the eye of the beholder. One day everyone will get their fairytale, or not so much.

"Friends"

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So here goes...
Is it just me? Or is it in my growing years I have developed a more refined taste in friends? Trim the fat, though I would love to trim the fat in other ways, but don't we all.
Finding out who your true friends are can sometimes hurt, I guess it's the sting of deception. 
We all have had or have that "friend" who drops us like a pile of crap on the side of the road.
Ex: let me call you to hangout and act like a friend while you drive.
Oh wait! Now I have a car and I do not need you anymore...
That was never a true friend, yet it is always hard to let go, even when you know it has all been fake, or they have done you wrong.
The worse part of all this: even when it was not your fault nor provoked, it makes you feel like there is something truly wrong with you. Which makes you run stupid scenarios in your head of what you could have done differently, or how you could have prevented all this. When in reality they are the ones with the problem not you.
It is human nature to find only our flaws, but why? Why must be always be so hard on ourselves? 
I propose a challenge for ourselves.
To try and stay positive, to be positive, to act positive. Mind, body and soul!
When life's Rollercoaster has us going though loops and turns we always try to find something positive, as small as it may be.
Hey they worse that can happen? 
Ok who is with me?! Let's try it out for 10 days.
Momma V.

New chapter

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A new school year is upon us. Some are just starting, some are finishing,  and some are starting new with their own children.
Whatever you may be doing, I hope this school year is a wonderful one.
As for my little family, we are starting new. I guess it's a big a event, it's the start of our child's academic career. I would like my child to start on the right foot. I will try my hardest to make that happen. I am scared of this new chapter, I am not very good anymore at meeting new people, I do not trust easily anymore. I blame my children for all this, since the moment I had my babies I have become this over protective, afraid of world women... I have tried many times to just break out of this, but I just send myself into a full blow panic attack... This new me sometimes drives my husband crazy, he says I use to be so free and open. Can you blame me? Yes it is so stupid to be afraid of the world, no matter what there will always be bad people.
It's a work in progress I guess.
I have also recently learned, I am not a very good team mom, my oldest was in a summer sport, and at the end they would play against eachother. My child was not the best and I wanted to yell and tell my child what to do... yeah I get way to competitive,oops hahhaha.
Anyhow back to school talk,
is it just me or, does every parent like to buy new supplies? It takes me back to when I was in school, I use to love opening up new supplies, or taking the stickers off of new things. OK let's be honest, I STILL DO!
OK so school hasn't even started and I am already worrier about making mommy friends. I hope I can make all those cute lunches I have been pinning too. Mind over matter, right?!
Have a wonderful school year everyone.

Shout out to the awesome fun you tube channel I watch.
Tryal by fyre. Go follow them!
Please keep reading my little blog, and thank you for all your support. Share share share ❤
Momma V

It starts

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OK so here goes, to all the mommies that have experienced LABOR...
I feel for the c-section mommas, they get split open plus bleed for 40 days! DAMN! Well I was lucky enough to have my babies vaginally, but an episiotomy isn't fun either. My active labor was fairly easy but  painful, duhhhh it's called LABOR for a reason. I find it very funny when I hear women say they never imagines it would hurt... 😨😲really... really... damn ladies, what did you think it would feel like? I am always so surprised when I hear these conversations, who have they been talking to? What is that saying "hope for the best, but expect the worse"? Something like that.
Have you guys ever seem, "what to expect when you're expecting"?  Well if you have, remember the part that she has to speak at the baby expo, well yes most of that is all true.
I have herd some horror stories about labor too, and wow these ladies are so strong.
I herd some ladies are left with not so fun side effects, like they pee when they sneeze or laugh or do anything heavy? That your feet sometimes grow a half a size to a size . OK see that one I was left with, so I have to buy the whole size instead of the the half .
Recently we watched a documentary and I could not even finish watching it. I had to get up and leave the room, I was in tears. How can a mother keep getting high while pregnant,  those poor babies suffer so much, they are in so much pain. It was just heart breaking, but people will do what they want to do. No one is perfect.
A happy baby is worth all the pain

   Momma -V

My boy

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Well I have a toddler boy, and I must say I am completely and utterly in love with him. I never knew I could love a little boy so much, he completes our little family, even thought he sometimes bugs his sister 😄
We do have a large extended family, we let both our children play with whatever toy they want, rather it be a "boy" toy or a "girl" toy. Our daughter of course has baby dolls, and one day he grabbed one and started cuddling it and calling it his baby. So from then on we let him play with it and his sister was so kind that she actually said he could have it ❤
We have gone on family outing where he takes his baby with him. We get the weirdest looks ever, especially from men, the worst one was the younger gentleman was disgusted that we allowed our son to go out with a girls toy... my jaw dropped and I honestly didn't know what to say, which is weird. Of course once I got to my car I had a great come back. I never have told my husband about this incident, for the fear of him going crazy. When we are with family Why is it so bad? What will a girl toy do to him? He mirrors what he sees. We are very hands one parents and show our kids that we love them but hugging and kissing them. No matter what my children grow up to be I will always love them. I greatest fear for them is that they will struggle, I never want my children to struggle to be who they are. God has blessed me with two beautiful children <- yes I went there. 
Love your kids, hug and kiss them whenever you can ❤ teach them to be accepting of others. Start them off young.
-Momma V

We all have an IT

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So a couple years ago my family almost came crashing down. We went through a very hard time, it really isn't something you wish on your worse enemy. Haha (not really haha funny) because now I have an enemy. I could have gone my whole life never seeing this horrible person again, to me that isn't a person anymore,  a person would never do this because a person has feelings and morals, so it's just call the person a thing or it. Well at least seeing it, would have been easier 5 years from now...
But life moves on. Unfortunately where we live is small and you are always bound to run into someone you don't really want to see. I have to live my life for my family.
Yesterday was the day, thay I came face to face with IT.  Yup and my heart felt frozen.  I hurried and went in a different direction because I was not about to have IT come try and talk to me while I was with my child. I dropped my child off and went directly to my car, thank God for the unlock buttons. I sat there and felt like I couldn't breathe I started to panic, how can IT still have this power over me, this ordeal was 2 years ago and it was all lies, because misery loves company right?!...
I guess even though our family is on the right track the wounds are still healing.
My dialed my husband right after I got in my car, but of course his phone sent me to voice mail (our signal sucks at home) so I did the next best thing, I called my sister.
I am so happy I have such a great support system. When I got home I ran to my husband crying, he thought something horrible had happened. He made me laugh after I told him what happened, he asked me if IT looked haggard? Yes IT did so he told me that I should take joy that I look good and that a wonderful family, while IT has nothing real, since IT ruins everything IT touches.
I have to remind myself that I could have lost it all, and how blessed I am to have so much love and support in my life.
So everyone please look at the positive things in your life and try and hold on to that feeling in the hard times. We all have an IT... and no matter what we will have to face our IT at one point of our lives, and I hope it gets easier.

- momma V

It's a great day to blog

Well I did it! I finally did it! 

What is it that I did? I finally started a blog, ha I fooled ya right?, thinking it might have been something juicy. Sorry to tell you all that I am not that interesting... 

Lets see where to start, I am a mother and a wife, and sometimes those two things have me wanting to hide under a rock. Lets face it, in life we have all wanted to hide under a rock at some point or another. 

I have done things a bit backwards, I had my first child then got married then decided to have another child. along that path we have had many up and downs. 

I will soon be sending my first born off to kindergarten, to me it's a big step, she will start forming real friendships and is now required to attending school. My babies have been very into star wars, I will be honest I have never seen the movies, but my husband is an avid lover of the dark side. It must be genetic because when this whole fascination started, my husband hadn't introduced them to it, until one day a commercial came on the tv and within 2 seconds the kids were hypnotized, at that moment star wars took over my household. 

My life right now revolves around raising two crazy wonderful kids and making our family and my marriage stronger. Most weekdays my days start around 6am and end at around 8pm and yes I fall asleep around 8-9 like an old person. Mornings and dinner time are usually the busiest times of my day.I am fortunate enough to have my husband home right now so he helps during those times. Laundry is my biggest enemy, it's not the process of gathering or sorting, nor putting them into the washer and dryers, its the process of putting them away. With four people its like the never ending story for adults, but after folding them I usually have a hard time putting them away. After cleaning, organizing, playing, feeding the kids, I don't have much energy for many things, so the fact that they get a home cooked meals every night should say something, they should help put the clothes away while I have some mommy time. 

Ok that last part was a lie, what is mommy time? I am sorry I don't get that, I am incredibly lucky if i am able to pee alone... I can't use the bathroom alone nor can I shower without an audience, yeah some of you might be saying "well lock the door", let me tell you something! I have locked the door, and my kids go crazy, as if I have traveled to another universe and they will never see me again... I rather have no privacy at this point then having to replace doors. My husband is nice enough to try and entertain the kids while I catch up on my favorite shows or if there is a cheesy lifetime movie I have been wanting to watch, I am not ashamed to admit it, I love me some cheesy lifetime movies. I usually never get a chance to watch more than 10 mins of anything while the kids are running around, even if daddy is helping, so we try and wait until after bedtime to watch anything together, and you guessed it... I am the one who passes out half way during the movie. 

I hope you all enjoyed reading a little about my life, will be back soon. 

It's a great day to blog

Momma V. 

Ps. Please get the word out about this blog. Thank you so much in advanced.